An email from peterbd!

I’ve been peripherally aware of the elusive peterbd for some time.  I was especially enthralled with his coverage in vice last year.  As of 23:29 Dec 22, 2013, I am proud to say that I am a recipient of a distinguished peterbd email.  

maryland’s crown prince

if you didn’t know that the above statement is a fact 

then wtf are you doing calling yourself a writer 

n williard is a literature champion 

he is the 2013 literature freedom fighter 

did for literature 

what mandela did as a beckon of equality 

what ghandi did as an embodiment of peace 

what obama did as a spearheader of change 

what beyonce did as the pop king supreme 

he’s a master of the written word 

the god does this in secrecy 

some things are better left unseen 

he can’t show the world all his cards 

in the cave 

creating something that will be respected across the board 

your brain will thank you when his words and your eyes meet 

when his future novel is released 

all you traditional academic know it alls will be forced to have a seat 

he’s rocky 

he’s big meech 

giving franzen the 1, 2 punch 

doing underground readings and stacking countless cheese 

has a day job 

strictly to pay his bills 

but at night he transforms into batman 

saving gotham from lazy prose 

laying the smackdown on corrupt politicians who don’t approve of online literature communities 

taking catwoman to task when she tries to steal his classics 

fucking up all the bad guys who have the nerve to question his authority 

you see?

without mr. williard we would be a city of lost souls 

believing what the literati want us to believe without thinking critically 

and no one has time for that shit 

he has no time for games 

the man has deadlines and can’t fit average ways of thought into his schedule 

only oprah and maybe bill gates can relate to this 

like a true innovator 

he’s burdened with being too gifted for this time period 

only orson wells had this burden 

oh well 

being the best is something that nick can deal with 

he’s been through hell 

but like puff daddy 

he won’t stop 

we’ll never let him 

it’s only a matter of time before his masterpiece drops 

earth is waiting for it patiently 

we’ll wait as long as possible because greatness takes time 

nick williard’s words are like no other 

his insight picks us up when we’re down 

and that’s precisely why 

he will forever wear the crown 

Tags: Equality

beachsloth:

COLOR ME FUNNY
                March 14th at Delia Foley’s at 8:30 PM Alt Lit history will be borne out of the mouths of babes. One of those babes is the infinitely affable Steve Roggenbuck, webmaster of ‘Live my Lief’ and preeminent poet of the online generation. Rarely does Mr. Roggenbuck make his way to Baltimore, Maryland. Yet that’s exactly what is happening this very Thursday, March 14th. Things are changing. Baltimore has done a lot to prepare itself for Steve Roggenbuck’s visit. What are most exciting are the little things about the arrival. Blink and one might miss them. 
                The first thing is the most obvious. The ‘Shamrock’ shake has transfigured itself into the ‘Shamcock’ shake to better advertise itself to Steve Roggenbuck’s legion of cockboys. Since settling down the cockboys have had an easy time of things in merry old Chicago, working as baristas and street walkers. And boy when one of Steve Roggenbuck’s cockboys passes, each person they pass goes ‘Ah’. It is like ‘The Girl from Ipanema’ but updated to include Steve Roggenbuck’s cockboy entourage. Many of them are looking forward to seeing Baltimore once more, a place so nice they named it once and promptly forgot about it because Washington, D.C. is right next door and less funky. More no mistake about it, Baltimore is funky as fuck. There is a reason John Waters set ‘Pink Flamingos’ in Baltimore. People get a real thrill out of it, like Steve Roggenbuck does whenever he visits. 
                Baltimore is ready for its self-appointed ‘sexual cartographer’.  Flowers are budding. Trees are growing there leaves once more. Some say this is due to the change of the seasons, from winter into spring. Life is coming to rescue people from the cold dark grays of winter. While there is some truth to this whole ‘season’ thing part of the reason is due to the infinitely fertile loins of Steve Roggenbuck. Sadly since Steve Roggenbuck last arrived on Baltimore’s hallowed-ass shores, he’s shed himself of the ‘pre and post’ cum filled pants that defined an era of him. Now sold on EBAY to someone who will definitely not wash them Steve has new plans for Baltimore. In Baltimore Steve Roggenbuck will twerk hard to create pre cum stains on the pants of hundreds of lucky boys and girls, transforming them into adults from mere children. 
                Alt Lit and comedy will come together for this delightful little shindig. Among the lucky ones are a bunch of comedians who will probably raise the roof, transforming scrappy little Delia Foley’s regular ceiling height into loft style. That’s classy. As an additional bonus Beach Sloth, a rare and mysterious beast, will make a rare appearance where he will either ‘rock the house’, ‘suck’, or more probably reach a level in between those two extremes. No photography please for Beach Sloth, but for Steve Roggenbuck: go nuts. Take lots of pictures. Steve Roggenbuck is the Johnny Appleseed of poetry. Watch him plant seeds of wisdom in the mind.

beachsloth:

COLOR ME FUNNY

                March 14th at Delia Foley’s at 8:30 PM Alt Lit history will be borne out of the mouths of babes. One of those babes is the infinitely affable Steve Roggenbuck, webmaster of ‘Live my Lief’ and preeminent poet of the online generation. Rarely does Mr. Roggenbuck make his way to Baltimore, Maryland. Yet that’s exactly what is happening this very Thursday, March 14th. Things are changing. Baltimore has done a lot to prepare itself for Steve Roggenbuck’s visit. What are most exciting are the little things about the arrival. Blink and one might miss them. 

                The first thing is the most obvious. The ‘Shamrock’ shake has transfigured itself into the ‘Shamcock’ shake to better advertise itself to Steve Roggenbuck’s legion of cockboys. Since settling down the cockboys have had an easy time of things in merry old Chicago, working as baristas and street walkers. And boy when one of Steve Roggenbuck’s cockboys passes, each person they pass goes ‘Ah’. It is like ‘The Girl from Ipanema’ but updated to include Steve Roggenbuck’s cockboy entourage. Many of them are looking forward to seeing Baltimore once more, a place so nice they named it once and promptly forgot about it because Washington, D.C. is right next door and less funky. More no mistake about it, Baltimore is funky as fuck. There is a reason John Waters set ‘Pink Flamingos’ in Baltimore. People get a real thrill out of it, like Steve Roggenbuck does whenever he visits. 

                Baltimore is ready for its self-appointed ‘sexual cartographer’.  Flowers are budding. Trees are growing there leaves once more. Some say this is due to the change of the seasons, from winter into spring. Life is coming to rescue people from the cold dark grays of winter. While there is some truth to this whole ‘season’ thing part of the reason is due to the infinitely fertile loins of Steve Roggenbuck. Sadly since Steve Roggenbuck last arrived on Baltimore’s hallowed-ass shores, he’s shed himself of the ‘pre and post’ cum filled pants that defined an era of him. Now sold on EBAY to someone who will definitely not wash them Steve has new plans for Baltimore. In Baltimore Steve Roggenbuck will twerk hard to create pre cum stains on the pants of hundreds of lucky boys and girls, transforming them into adults from mere children. 

                Alt Lit and comedy will come together for this delightful little shindig. Among the lucky ones are a bunch of comedians who will probably raise the roof, transforming scrappy little Delia Foley’s regular ceiling height into loft style. That’s classy. As an additional bonus Beach Sloth, a rare and mysterious beast, will make a rare appearance where he will either ‘rock the house’, ‘suck’, or more probably reach a level in between those two extremes. No photography please for Beach Sloth, but for Steve Roggenbuck: go nuts. Take lots of pictures. Steve Roggenbuck is the Johnny Appleseed of poetry. Watch him plant seeds of wisdom in the mind.

(via altlitgossip)

Cover of A team